the way i am don't fit my shadow
so it's friday again.
as i was strolling to the library i was thinking how much i like fridays. sure, every day is like friday when you don't work. that is true. BUT, you don't get free donuts every day at the library. i was out late last night and was going to sleep in all morning.
but then i remembered the free donuts at the library.
i decided to sleep all afternoon instead.
donuts inspire me to walk, which is good. i need to walk. it's hard to drive the stick shift wonder truck with a donut in my hand. so i try to walk on fridays. mmm...chocolate donut today was good.
problem is, i don't really need anything at the bank. just the donut. so sometimes i pretend i just want to check my balance. sometimes i just withdraw $20. then i get a donut.
why all this talk of donuts?
it's the little things these days. and free donuts are one of those little things. i love donuts. and they're pretty cheap. but funds are tight. so i don't buy donuts. but every friday, if i remember, i can get one for free. and that makes me happy.
the bank here is totally from another time. everything is written out by hand--no computer printouts. i don't trust it if it's not from the computer. it's really crzy. everytime i deposit $$ (which is quite rare actually), they just write it down on a deposit slip and give me that. when i make a withdraw, they just write on a slip how much they're giving me. i don't like it. i don't trust it.
i want to see it say how much my balance was, and how the transaction just made affected the balance. but it doesn't say that. that scares me.
so i was walking up the road, donut in hand, enjoying the fall day, thinking that i like fridays just because of donuts. it's a totally different life that i'm leading out here. and i kind of like it.
i realized back in Cville i bought lots of things, and obsessed over lots of things (cds, dvds, etc), and used these things to be happy, and to live a fuller life. now? now i'm just living. and living it up. life is full. and i like it. TX rocks.
yesterday i heard the merle haggard sang "the way i am" 2 times. it's some sign or something. i totally love that song. funny though. i always thought the lyrics were what i typed up in the title for this post. and i thought it was cool and deep. actual lyrics are "the way i am don't fit my shackles". quite different. still good, but quite different. i've always liked that song though.
"Wish I was down on some blue bayou,
With a bamboo cane stuck in the sand.
But the road I'm on, don't seem to go there,
So I just dream, keep on bein' the way I am.
Wish I enjoyed what makes my living,
Did what I do with a willin' hand.
Some would run, ah, but that ain't like me.
So I just dream and keep on bein' the way I am"
dang. that's a good one. i think that's how i've felt for quite a while now.
the shackles were starting to get to me.
i was just getting by, dreaming of better things.
but now i'm living it.
if i could just find that job that i loved, then i'd be set.
in time maybe. in time.
And now hopefully i'll get a chance to hear him sing it. i just realized the Hag is playing in Austin next week, and it's pretty cheap for a Hag show. and i have to go. and hopefully he sings that song.
that's what i was thinking about this fine, fall morning in TX.
and how much i liked fridays.
and as i approached the library, donut in belly, i saw that the parking lot at the library was full of cars.
it's never packed early in the morning.
that's one reason why i like to get here when it first opens, b/c there's never many people here.
except on fridays.
then i remembered thats why i don't love fridays.
fridays, i remembered, are toddler story time.
swarms of little loud kids descend upon book stacks and someone tells them stories.
it's back in a private room, but every once in a while you here them yell.
not too bad.
until story time is over.
and then it's a madhouse. kids everywhere. screaming and yelling and running.
kids are cute.
hopefully i get done w/ my internet activities before the army of children marches out here.
|
